holiday meltdown begins

first, i think turkeys are cool. they're the oddest looking things, but beautiful. here's some turkey links:

wikiturkey
turkeyfacts
turkeyhistory [scroll down for article]
turkeyjokes

this post is dedicated to all those who for whatever reason, don't like the holidays. not because the holidays themselves are awful, but because of the plastic meaning and artificial emotional filler shoved down our throats by our western culture. this false brevity amplifies bad memories, strains families, and causes untold bouts of anxiety and depression.

if you're relating to this, then know you're not alone. our society shuts off during times like this, and those who don't play along with the plastic joy, well, sometimes its hard on these days.

i've done the family thing, guest of significant others sibling thing, the family with guest thing, the married with inlaws as guest thing, guest of the inlaws thing, child of a single parent as guest of her friends thing, sitting at the kids table thing, divorced friends getting together thing, serving dinner to the homeless thing, attending the church's meal thing, not celebrating, celebrating, going to the movies…
i've done the holidays as many ways as i can and this year i'm burnt out. i just don't care its a fucking holiday.

part of this i think comes from the forced nature of this time of year. its embedded deep in our culture on religious, economic, political, mythic, and pop culture levels and cuts across most of the other blather usually holding court. there's no escape. even google has a turkey in their logo today.

don't misunderstand, i think the ideas of thanksgiving, christmas, hanuka, and kwanza are terrific. today, a day of "thanksgiving" is really not about the turkey, or the family, or whatever, its about gratitude to God for what a person has been blessed with in their life.

its the iconic surface 'blessing' idea i don't like. God chooses to bestow his blessings in uncountable ways. some people get large loving families that get closer at the holidays, some people get material things like houses and financial security, some get good jobs where they're respected by their coworkers, and meaningful work. others are blessed, but not in that way. perhaps, thru no fault of their own they have a dysfunctional family, or no family at all, maybe they're poor, even though they have a job, but the office is dysfunctional, where psychopaths are rewarded for aggressive bullying behavior. but maybe those same people are blessed in other ways.

maybe they've been blessed with artistic talent, inner strength, resourcefulness, intelligence, and imagination, things intangible, but priceless. these are blessings too. possessing them is no guarantee of anything, but neither is a large family, material goods, or an important job--those things can be taken away in a heartbeat. blessings that reside inside a person cannot be stolen from them, or taken by greed. these intangible blessings, hidden from the world's view are those i think about and am grateful for on this holiday.

so if you're not perpetuating the mediocre standard today but instead counting your hidden blessings--i wish you a happy thanksgiving!